I'm not really sure why I'm going to talk about this.
I guess to talk it out.
Six years ago, I asked the Doctor to tie my tubes. They said I was not old enough, nor did I have enough children to tie my tubes. That seems a bit ridiculous to me. If a person does not want more kids, that should be their decision, regardless of their age or amount of children.
Three years ago, I asked a new doctor to tie my tubes again. This time I got as far as signing the consent form. But this time, other people talked me out of it.
And talked me into getting this stupid piece of plastic in my arm instead. I have hated that thing since the day she put it in there. I've had migraines, insane bleeding, cramps that could cause me to murder, etc. But alas, it was there.
Until Monday.
I guess to talk it out.
Six years ago, I asked the Doctor to tie my tubes. They said I was not old enough, nor did I have enough children to tie my tubes. That seems a bit ridiculous to me. If a person does not want more kids, that should be their decision, regardless of their age or amount of children.
Three years ago, I asked a new doctor to tie my tubes again. This time I got as far as signing the consent form. But this time, other people talked me out of it.
And talked me into getting this stupid piece of plastic in my arm instead. I have hated that thing since the day she put it in there. I've had migraines, insane bleeding, cramps that could cause me to murder, etc. But alas, it was there.
Until Monday.
(Prep stuff to remove the implanon)It was...horrible. It took almost an hour of digging and cutting scar tissue to remove it. It took 3 shots of anesthetic. And an hour of listening to the scissors snip away inside my arm. I wanted to puke for hours after. In fact, I still feel a little sick thinking about it. But, it's out.
So now I have to make a new decision. While I have insurance. Am I really going to have more babies? Am I really ever going to be in a situation where I want more? Am I emotionally equipped to ever deal with another? Would it be fair to Bri and Noah and even to the unborn child?
The answer to all of the above questions is No.
So why am I so scared about getting this done?
I guess because of the word permanent. In my world, nothing is permanent. Nothing. So having to make a permanent decision is terrifying.
I also think that I am scared I'll never meet anyone once I'm sterilized, lol. I mean, really, who wants to date or marry a girl with two especially needy kids that can't even them one of their own?
But the time has come. In 15 days, I will be permanently unable to have children. In 15 days, I will never even have a thought about having another baby.
I decided to go with the Essure. It's permanent, more effective then a tubal, with less recovery time and no incisions.
It's basically two little coils that they shove into your tubes.
So now I have to make a new decision. While I have insurance. Am I really going to have more babies? Am I really ever going to be in a situation where I want more? Am I emotionally equipped to ever deal with another? Would it be fair to Bri and Noah and even to the unborn child?
The answer to all of the above questions is No.
So why am I so scared about getting this done?
I guess because of the word permanent. In my world, nothing is permanent. Nothing. So having to make a permanent decision is terrifying.
I also think that I am scared I'll never meet anyone once I'm sterilized, lol. I mean, really, who wants to date or marry a girl with two especially needy kids that can't even them one of their own?
But the time has come. In 15 days, I will be permanently unable to have children. In 15 days, I will never even have a thought about having another baby.
I decided to go with the Essure. It's permanent, more effective then a tubal, with less recovery time and no incisions.
It's basically two little coils that they shove into your tubes.
The tubes recognize the foreign body and build scar tissue around time. Thus, no fertilization. And that's that. It takes like 15 minutes, about an hour for the anesthesia to wear off enough to go home and a day for recovery...
The end.
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